It has now been two months since we lost Maveric.
Sometimes I still have these moments where I just honestly cannot believe that we are going through this. I must say that it got worse before it started to get better for me. When we first heard the news there was a part of me that felt like I had known it was too good to be true all along. I just went into my shell and stayed there for weeks.
Then when I started to try to get back to life, I realized how hard it really was going to be. I have just been so angry at everything and didn't know how to get back to the happy person I used to be.
I am happy to say that although each day is a challenge still, I have started to get back to my old joyful self. I will never forget that I lost my baby, but I am starting to look forward to the month where we can talk about trying again. I didn't ever think I would get here when I was feeling all that fresh pain from losing Maveric ... but I am almost there.
One of my dearest friends shared a really great quote with me today. He was watching Private Practice last night and shared this:
A woman said to the other Dr something like “Look at you, your beautiful, a Dr, talented… God’s got to challenge you with something every once in a while.” Ok – that’s a bad re-quote but I cannot find the exact quote online. Anyway, the point is people have to get challenged with obstacles in our lives from time to time. For two reasons, 1) because even though obstacles can be painful, we learn and grow because of them and 2) so we can appreciate all of the good times and things we are blessed by having in our lives.
My dear friend is right. I am getting there. I try to remember each day how grateful for all of the amazing things in my life (especially my husband, family and friends). It just is so much harder to do now than it ever was in the past.
So here are some pictures to help me remember all of the amazing things I am thankful for in the midst of all this pain.
Thank you all for your support and love in the last 2 months. We truly appreciate your understanding.